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"The strangest and most fantastic fact about negative emotions is that people actually worship them." -- P.D. Ouspensky
|Episode 22: It's Greek to me|
@ Where`s Cherie?
Aug 05 2002 - 09:19 PST
|cherie writes: June 2000|
Starring: Kristi and Cherie
Co-Starring: Rob (on the weekends, he's still clinging to that job thing.)Introducing: Carter, she's 29 yrs old, tall, single, gorgeous, wants 5 kids, and so far we've talked her into committing to a month's worth of adventures with us. Beware, she won't remember your name!Dearly Departed: Jay (Kristi's couisin, he went back to Virginia to be a famous base player.)
Location: France and Greece
If you are ever given the choice to celebrate your birthday in two countries, do it. We said "au revior" to France with a Birthday celebration at the Eiffle Tower letting the finest Parisian champagne tickle our noses as the sun slipped behind the river Seine, turning it a violent purple. Since we had dinner in Paris, it seemed only appropriate to have dessert in Greece, so we flew there.
My Birthday dinner the next night (you have to milk these celebrations when you can) was at a charming roof-top restaurant over-looking the Acropolis, a beam of moonlight illuminating the Parthenon like it was a museum piece. Tucked in the corner a quartet dedicated songs to me as Kristi shook her hips to the wild beat of clapping waiters. "What a ham!" I exclaimed and the waiter turned pale. "No," he said far too serious, "it's lamb." My dinner had been served.
My parents will be happy to know that it was here, in Greece, the birthplace of philosophy, that I have decided what I want to be when I grow up: A professional "baklava" taster. It was Carter's idea, so now we just need a business plan and some investors. Jack (Carter's dad) are you in?
If that plan doesn't work out, we have a back-up: we're going to be actors. After all, we ran into Ron Howard at the Parthenon (of course we have the picture to prove it!) Unfortunately our schedules were booked, so we couldn't be in his next movie. Though, if it were Greek, we would be easily cast:Kristi: Godess of leisureCarter: Godess of laughterCherie: Godess of licking ice-cream
Needing to burn off all the ice-cream and baklava consumed daily we headed for the Olympic stadium (the only stadium in the world built entirely of marble.) Ready to race, Kristi, Carter and I crouched down, shaking the sweat from our finger-tips as we placed our hands behind the dusty chalk lines waiting for the sound that would send us into a sprint. That sound would be the click of the camera. Ooops, false start, we were out of film. (Why is it that you never realize that you are out of film until you have framed the perfect shot?) The second 'click' sent us joggling around the same track where 104 years ago the first Olympians raced.
Speaking of which, Greece is having a hard time gearing up for the 2004 Olympics it's hosting. Athens is building a very very fast subway, very very slow (they keep digging up historical monuments!) 2500 year old ruins and temples are everywhere, like McDonalds in the USA. Better yet, in Athens, the monuments are right next to the McDonalds.
All the monuments aren't old, McDonald's has its own monument to gluttony, the MEGA-MAC which has 4 all-beef patties. Maybe that's why Greece has such good athletes, they are well-fed. Now when the superior athletes don't make the Olympic trials (too many Mega-Macs) they become National Guards. There are three requirements to be a National Guard in Greece:1. Be male2. Be over 6 feet tall3. Be gorgeous (really, it is a requirement, and an incentive to watch the changing of the guards (over and over).)
The reward for this is that you (as a guard) get to stand very straight, look very serious and wear a very unflattering skirt (400 pleats to remind you of the 400 years the Greeks were under Turkish rule.) Consider the fluffy pom-poms that go on your shoes an added bonus.
Stay tuned: The next adventure begins in Crete.Cherie
The reward for this is
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